Timmy, Tommy, and Chris

I teach high school students. It's a pretty good deal. I like being around teenagers most of the time and, hopefully, they like being in my class. I'm 26 years old... and only 8 years older than some of my kids. There are good things and bad things about that, I guess. The good being that I can relate to them pretty well, they are comfortable around me, and we have a lot of things in common (music, sports, etc). The bad being....well, basically everything I just mentioned. There's a fine line to walk with students when you're a young teacher and I'm sure I've let some things go that I shouldn't have or joked around too much, but I don't think a student has ever had a bad experience in my class. The most important thing for me is to be someone they will remember in a positive way and, if possible, be someone they can respect. I was lucky enough to have three people like that when I was a teen-ager.
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When I was 15 years old, I started to become active in my church's youth group. I had always gone to church, but was never really active. Truth be told, there was a girl I sort of liked in the youth group and the only time I got to see her was at church, so basically I went as much as I could. That spring there was a youth intern named Timmy who was a student at a local college that was hired at the church. Later that spring, Timmy became interim youth minister and hired two guys to be his interns for the summer: Tommy and Chris. Almost everyday that summer, I was at church playing ping-pong, whiffle ball, or breaking my wrist playing dunk basketball at the gym. It was the foundation that set me where I am today. It was the beginning of a time in my life that could've been riddled with mistakes, but wasn't. Most of all, it allowed me to be around college guys who loved God and set an example for me.
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Timmy was small and sort of mousy, to be honest. He loved soccer and loved embarassing the hell out of me for no good reason at all. I was/am closer to Timmy than the other two. Timmy performed my wedding ceremony; my first date with my wife was a double date with his wife and him. I was a youth intern under him in college and eventually was interim youth minister after he left. Timmy was the most approachable person I have ever met and I've told him more things that he ever wanted to know. He's sat through his share of complaints about school, my parents, people in general. He's seen me completely lose it and get thrown out of basketball games for fighting. We've been lost in Kentucky, lost in Alabama, lost in Florida, driven 24 straight hours from Palm Beach, flew to Israel, sat on the steps where Jesus stood, watched lots of Seinfeld, talked about even more Seinfeld, blackmailed each other, and talked about nothing more times than I can count. If I had to pick one person that had the most influence on me in my teen age years, it would be Timmy.

Timmy and me at Justin's Wedding (Fall 2004)

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Tommy was the one who loved sports and played whiffle ball and basketball and video games with us. He was also the one who gambled with us on church trips and got mad at us when we played sports against him. He was the one who duct taped my legs and made me sit in a closet on a church trip to Atlanta and made fun of me for being gay because my broken wrist was set in a feminine position in the cast. He also announced to everyone on the charter bus that I liked our preacher's daughter who was a few grades younger than I was. For all of those exceptional qualities, the one thing I can remember about Tommy is that he came over to my house a couple of days a week when I was pretty down about not playing baseball because of my wrist and we would play "homerun derby" on Sega. Tommy took things over the line a lot and was probably not suited for the job that summer, but he did care about us and no one ever doubted that.

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If I wanted to be like one of the three guys that summer, it was Chris. Chris was the only one who had a girlfriend at the time and I guess I thought that was cool. He was also a pretty cool guy to be around, but looking back, was probably the most distant. I don't think I ever got as close to Chris as I could have because I didn't see him as approachable. It was more like a "hero worship" thing with him. Two memories stick out in my mind about Chris: the first being a letter he wrote me to encourage me about a situation I was going through my junior year in high school. I still have the letter and everytime I write a letter to one of my students to encourage them or help them through a situation, I remember the letter Chris wrote me. The second one I remember is the time we went "caving". I'm not sure why this left an impression on me, but it did. I rode with Chris and his girlfriend (Sarah) to the cave and I guess that made me feel important. Sarah was around a lot that summer and I remember I thought it was cool having a college girl around.

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Timmy and I still keep in touch and my wife and I are going to visit him and his wife when we go to New York City this October. Timmy lives in New Jersey and is a church planter. Tommy and I actually played on the same basketball team this winter and both lost our tempers. We played against each other, too, and had to be seperated once or twice. He still lives in Jackson and is a police officer. Last time I saw Chris, he and his wife (Sarah) were in Texas. He was at one of the biggest churches in the country doing youth ministry. It seems like a good fit for him. I think he was always meant to be on a big stage. It fits his personality.

I was always closest to Timmy, wanted to be like Chris, but found out that I'm more like Tommy. I learned I could never work in a church and I don't have the patience to be as approachable as Timmy is. I am much different than I was eleven years ago (I guess everyone is), but I hope I can have the same impact on someone else that these three men had on me.